Michael

Bedroom secrets

The following article I quote from a newspaper:
Some people rather sleep with their cat than with their partner, in spite of the fact that the little creature has a smelly breath and it takes the biggest part of the bed in possession.

This is concluded by a British lady who has spoken to a hundred cat owners. I am going to analyze this conclusion and give you my informed option from the cat’s perspective:

1. Some people rather sleep with their cat than with their partner: this is totally clear to me; I wonder why this is mentioned.
2. in spite of the fact that the little creature has a smelly breath: why, smelly breath? Did you ever smell your own breath?
3. and it takes the biggest part of the bed in possession: What? You take the biggest part of the bed and toss about all night so that I wake up all the time. Do you find it odd that I have to sleep by day to make it up?

This conclusion doesn’t make any sense, as you notice. But what do you want? The research is done by a human and the cat’s contribution has not been asked for. The right conclusion of the research should have been:
Because some people rather sleep with their cat than with their partner, we cats are forced to give up a big part of our bed to them and take the smelly breath of the human into the bargain.

Now that I have translated the article to English I’m going to send it to that lady because I, naturally, expect a response with the necessary excuses.

Michael

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